i have lucid dreams about short films in black and white.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

the world is a sad sight.

I'm listening to The Postal Service as I write this. I am hoping it will inspire my poetry rather than feed it so they sound too similar...Here we go...

I like to tweak my mind
and turn thoughts upright
Forget the fight
the way we behaved last night

Influence our sleek tummies
Anorexic girls trying to get chubby
Sucking on sweet fruits
belittling their snow boots

Broken heads and beat-up hearts
We should have stopped this before it starts
Inappropriate photos on Polaroid film
escapes the beholder who pushes pins in her wrists
awaits the reaction shes grown to resist

My head bobs out of the frame
My eyes blink as my vocal cords go insane
My fingers snap to ignore neck pain
Then I smile frequently as I get the blame

She cant help but to wash her hands
and eat only food that has been canned
Afraid of the sun so she gets no tan
her feet haven't even touched the sand

We swallow our pills
with cheap water that spills
down our chins
She thinks she grows fins
Tells me that *they* make her
walk barefoot in the winter

I nod my head
because the tics don't fall dead
Sleep is my reverie
for me to escape the mentally
people who
collect my spit
(and they plan on cloning me with it)

Okay so I've come to terms that I really suck at photography in the winter. I also need to be able to drive so I can actually go places to take pictures at. I really hate not being able to photograph anything because that's the only thing I'm somewhat good at...I can't do sports or clubs because I'm sort of afraid of people and I can't interact well. I like to write but no one appreciates that. I want to be known for something. I want that to be photography. I don't want to be stuck at home all the time being sad with nothing to do.

I hate how I get all "prettied up" for a picture then cant manage to get a decent photograph. I hate it. So. Much.

Does anyone read my blog? I sort of wish someone would cause then I wouldn't be keeping all of this inside.


  1. What Camera do you use for photography?

  2. Cool...digital or film? I have the digital, well actually i have a rebel Ti2000 film as well, i just haven't used it in awhile...The digital is an awesome camera though...

  3. you and i are too much alike.

    try using film. i traded up this last year and have been having so much more fun. get a 35mm camera, and to develop its only something like 6$ for 30.