i have lucid dreams about short films in black and white.

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Uninspired Days.







I am constantly reminding my mind that everyone goes through those patches of freakishly uninspired days. Today is just an extremely rough patch. I don't think I can really "capture a moment" anymore because I spend too much time trying to make the moments happen.

A lot is on my mind...believe me. So much more than photography. Boys, health, feelings...and they all fall together somehow. A boy likes me but doesn't know the real me and if he knew my uhm condition then I don't think he would want me and that, well, hurts my feelings. It makes me feel unwanted.

I want winter to be over. There is nothing beautiful about winter except for the snow and lights which are rather hard to capture if you are me. If I keep going out at night trying to capture bokeh photos with me sitting in the snow in shorts and a t-shirt all winter...it'll be the death of me. I swear.

I might start writing poems about my picture and maybe you'll get the real story behind them...sound good? Great.

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